Grim’s Grumble’s

Hey People. I know its been awhile but I thought I’d put a little something up for you good folks to read. But first a quick update on Teg and I. You may or may not know I started Uni in September and I’ll be honest the pace has been much more punishing than I ever expected. So I slacked off the blog totally. #LazyGrim . Sorry about that. Teg is dying of some strange lurgi and may never again be able to wipe his own backside. He did write an outstanding script for a sit-com that got right the way through to final judging at BBC3. In my humble opinion, they missed out on what should have been THE outstanding pilot of 2013. Their loss.  Anywho to footballing matters…………..

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It wouldn’t be Xmas if I didn’t let fly about something, so if you are unlucky enough to be reading this, be aware it might be you. I said I have been busy this season basically with work, but I have been paying attention to everything, and frankly my piss is starting to boil. So onto Grim’s Gripes…

1)    Vurnon Anita. He’s great, he’s shit, he can play, he can’t play. Give your heads a fucking wobble. Signed from Ajax as a product of their academy since he was a sperm, playing typically Dutch football and people expected him to walk straight into our Newcastle squad and be the next playmaker extraordinaire. Well he didn’t, and if you expected him to, more the fool you. EPL football is unique in the world, Pace and power rule, if you have that you can survive, add technique to the mix and you become good. Vernon has pace and technique, the power bit takes sometime to develop and adjustments need to be made to a style of play he knows nothing about. Last season it was Davide Santon who copped the flak and look at him now? Anita is going to get better and better this season and next season, then lets really start to see how good he can be.

2)    Defending. Where do we start here? At the top I guess. The club dropped a serious bollock in my opinion in the summer window and didn’t bring the faces in we needed in defence for the sake of whatever it was, money, pride, stubbornness. We were always going to struggle with the personnel we had. We needed to get stronger, more robust, not stay the same or weaker. Krul’s injury on international duty certainly upset the defence, and even with the Dilsh putting in some good performances in his absence, the defence never looks the same with out Krul in it. Davide Santon has been one of the high points of the season so far as far, in my opinion. Best thing is , I think he’s going to get even better. My biggest worry is that someone will start sniffing around him with big money to spend very soon. To be honest if I could fine a dog that would sniff around Mike Williamson, I’d sell him on the spot. He tries hard, can be good in the air, but spends more time on his arse than a footballer with no legs. He will be a excellent Championship defender, but that’s his limit. It pains me to say it, but it’s the truth. Speaking of being pained to say. Coloccini.. He’s hasn’t been the lynchpin he was last season, he’s made some shocking decisions and the team have suffered for it. The ink is probably not even dry on his new contract. I think we might have dropped the ball there. As for Tayls….. he’s Tayls, he’s a moron but he’s our moron. What I’d give for one full season out of him though. Finally Danny Simpson. I couldn’t care who is is bonking, nor how he flaunts it on twitter, but if he approaches women like he does a winger coming at him, I’d be amazed he ever gets laid. Back off, back off, back off …oh shit, its too late. I’d be amazed if he signs any contract put in front of him from us.  Oh well

3)    The Double Demba Dilemma. Well,  ‘sigh’. What a load of bollocks this has been. Ba in, sell Ba, Cisse is shite. I honestly don’t know what to think. I think its fairly safe to say Ba spat the dummy out in the close season about being sent to the wing to do a job. So we started the season for too many games at 4-4-2 and that didn’t work so well. At all. I haven’t done the math, but I’m betting despite today’s valiant effort we are bang on target for relegation form. Which sucks. I like Cisse more than Ba, but Ba is the one scoring all the goals. I think in 30 something days Ba will be somewhere else and the problem might have resolved itself. I honestly really don’t know on this one.

4)    Injuries. We are getting too many. Simple as that. Ref’s are being shit, but there has to be something else at play. One or two of our Gaelic contingent seeing a lack of signings and ‘having their heads turned ‘in the summer?.  Or maybe the training pitch needs relaying again.

5)    Tiote. He just hasn’t got going this season has he? Or rather he has embraced being ‘The Beast’ a bit too much and forgot how to actually play football. Either way he needs to shape up, from Titan to Toerag over a summer sucks.

6)    Mike Ashley. Here, I’ll say it. He is doing a good job for us and not everything in NUFC’s world is his fault. He might have been a little looser with the purse strings in the summer, but he wasn’t, he’s still learning this ‘how to run a football club’ game, and his curve has been a steep one. In all honesty I expect these next 12 months to the most important in his ownership. He’ll either get it right or …well I don’t even want to think about the alternative.

7)    Referee’s and football in general. I’ve said it for a while now, but all is not well in the English game. There is an insidious undercurrent of cheating , unsportsmanlike stuff and nastiness bubbling away barely under the surface. The ref’s are blind whenever it suits them, some managers are touchline tyrants and can get away with anything they see fit and some players are not fit to wear the shirt of any club with their behavior. It’s bullshit and it is ruining the game. Someone at the FA needs to stand up and be counted and start to put this right, otherwise I can see a) players getting really hurt and b) the next big footballing corruption scandal coming from the EPL.

8)    Twitter. I believe in communication. I believe it’s a force for good on the whole. It has made me some good friends I have never met. Yet  there are stupid people out there who say things to people that they would not dream of saying in person to those they are addressing. Before you start, yes I’ll happily say any of what I have wrote here or anywhere else to the person involved. So why do people think its OK to abuse our players? Or even other players? I’m not just on about the banter and occasional affront. I’m talking about the nasty vile shit some people spout, just to get a reaction or because they enjoy trolling others. I dunno, it bugs me and if you see it happening, pull the fucker up about it and click unfollow afterwards.

I think that’s about enough, other than to say I expect some interesting things to happen in this January window, Ashley is a gambler and there is a hell of a lot of TV money at stake this season. Predictions? In: Remy, Douglas, Debuchy and a mystery man. Out: Ba, Simpson and Tiote. Feel free to add your thoughts or transfer predictions in the comments section below, hope y’all had an excellent Xmas and all the Very Best for the New Year.

Grim

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